Tuesday, December 10, 2019

Day 2 Thankfulness and Giving


It is interesting, I had some personal things come up last week and it postponed my start to this practice for a day.  I found myself distracted and feeling like I couldn’t find my place to write about thankfulness and then last night, I forced myself to sit down and just write, to see what came to me.  This morning, my heart feels lighter, I feel happier, I feel more myself again. So, onto day 2!

During my trip down memory lane to take stock of my life, so many memories flooded in about my Dad.  I lost him 2.5 years ago. He was sick much of my childhood and by the time he was the age that I am today, he had had three heart attacks, had heart surgery, been through cardiac rehab twice, and had given up on living. He assumed because his parents had died young (all for treatable conditions that had they gone to the doctor they would have lived much longer) that he needed to burn the candle at both ends to get as much out of life as possible before it was gone. So, he didn’t take care of himself; he drank what he wanted, ate what he wanted and smoked as much as he wanted, until life played an interesting joke on him: life continued.

My father lived to be 78 years old; yet he had to live his life in a body that wouldn’t allow him to do the things that he wanted to do. During this period of his life, he had a lot of time to reflect and he would share his wisdom with me often. He told me that had he known he would live so long; he would have taken care of himself.  He would have still enjoyed life, but with perhaps a bit less abandon. He would have been able to enjoy time with his son and grandson, and he would have been able to live to see his daughter (me) find her way in the world,  and he would have gotten to meet her new family and come to love them and they could have loved him. He missed meeting my new family by three weeks.

I am a work in progress when it comes to taking care of myself. I will often give so much of myself to those that I love that I can collapse from exhaustion.  I am known for giving in to less than healthy food options when I am in need of comfort. And, I will often take on additional responsibilities so my family can exercise and eat healthy food, in lieu of my having time to exercise or relax. However, I did have my surgery this year that I have needed for over ten years, that allows me to breath. I have started (and stopped and started again) a healthy eating plan and I am trying to figure out a way to give myself time to exercise and to have down time to recharge.  Through all of this, I am so very thankful for good health.  I am thankful that my family is in good health, I am thankful that I am in good health, and I am committed to learning from my father’s mistakes in order to look back on a life where I was able to enjoy the world around me, my family and the flow of sweet animals that will be a part of my life now and in the future. I know that each day is a gift, so, it is time for me to go for a walk and appreciate the day that has been given to me.

To show my appreciation and thankfulness for what I have today, I have made a $20.00 donation to each of the following charities:


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